The country was certainly more divided at the Thanksgiving of 1863.


With Thanksgiving fast approaching I’ve been reading about, and even more unfortunately, hearing from friends and clients about, holiday plans being canceled.

The NY Times even mentioned a couple that has changed the location of their wedding so that the groom’s aunts, strong Trump supporters, won’t be able to attend.

And it’s far from just “extended” family. A client told me the other day she got “into it” with her children and told them she voted for Trump because she believes he will keep the country safer for them and their children.

They called her a racist and said they won’t be coming for Thanksgiving.

Her daughter said, “I don’t know how, as a woman you could vote for him. I don’t know who you are anymore”.

Welcome to the new normal. Love him or hate him, he has everyone talking about him and his politics. Only it’s not your ordinary politics.

The shame is that this divisiveness is infiltrating every part of our daily life, from the boardroom to the bedroom to the theater.

And it’s killing our individual, community and societal vibrations.

You knew it wouldn’t take too long before our last bastion of love, the Thanksgiving dinner table, became a war zone.
And regrettably, the emotional casualties will tear families apart.

wingmanI love Thanksgiving. It’s all about gratitude, appreciation, acceptance and love. All feel good emotions that help raise our vibrations.
It’s my favorite holiday of the year and it’s being racked with political strife.

And the negative momentum is building.

What’s a Wingman to do?

How about you stop it before it gets started and declare your Thanksgiving a “Noil_570xn-903876310_lslb Politics Zone”.  Put a sign up on the front door so everyone knows immediately upon entering, there will be no politics discussed here today.

That’s right. Let’s see if we can get back on the positivity track with our families by focusing on what brings us together instead of what tears us apart.

I understand the vitriol, the venom and the bitterness.
And I’m not saying there’s not reason for it.
There is.

Since the election there has been an explosion of hate crimes.
America is on scary ground right now, and it’s probably going to get worse before it gets better. There’s real fear, real hate and real passion, and it won’t take much to ignite.

All I’m asking, is for you to not let it happen this Thursday while we’re supposed to be finding things to be thankful for. Call a (family) truce and don’t allow this discord to kidnap your holiday feast.

With that in mind, you’ll need something to talk about.

Here are a few Wingman practices to help you keep the conversation moving in a constructive, positive and productive way.

1. The alphabet game. Go around the table, and starting with the letter “A” have each person in succession state something they are thankful for. Move from letter to letter through the alphabet.

2. Pretend it’s Thanksgiving 2017. You’re all together celebrating Thanksgiving again and, in succession, have people identify something that happened this “past” year that made them happy (and they’re not allowed to say Trump was impeached). Go around the table at least 3 times.

3. Take a lesson from the presidential debate and go around the table, each person taking a turn naming one thing they love or respect about the person next to them.

You can do this. I’m not saying it will be easy, but it will be so important in helping each person at your table find the “Thanks” in Thanksgiving.

Who knows, maybe it will even help America heal.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Your Wingman,

PS… You can practice with me every morning, either on Facebook, at Be Your Own Wingman, on Twitter, @wingmanmichael, or on YouTube, at beyourownwingman.

PSS… If you want to improve your positive energy, increase your level of success, and begin living the life you desire, feel free to contact me for Skype sessions with both Janet, an LCSW and Psychotherapist for the past 20 years, and myself.