I’ve been thinking, hearing and reading about many different ways that people allow fear to control their lives.

Maybe it’s because Jan and I are staying in Sutton, Ireland, a suburb of Dublin, and I’ve been very focused on the fact that for us to get around easily, I’m going to have to drive a car with a manual transmission, operating the stick shift with my left hand, from the “passenger” side of the car, while driving on the “opposite” side of the road.


Driving in Ireland.

Not that I have to. There is a train stop about 2 miles from us.
And a bus that stops only a few blocks away.

On the scale of “fear”, this is a pretty minor one.

But like any fear, no matter how small, it grows larger when we allow it to.
And then, it takes over our lives.

Yes, fear of driving may be seemingly insignificant to you, and even to me, but I assure you there are many who have allowed that fear to keep them stuck in one place.

And that’s a “minor” fear.

How about those who have a fear of failure?
Or death? Or rejection? Or ridicule? Or loneliness? Or pain?
I was even just reading about people who live in fear of the unknown.

How about the fear of flying, or public speaking, or heights?
Or the fear of intimacy, or commitment?

Are we getting a little closer to home now?

I have a client who wouldn’t leave her home, and another who wouldn’t let her husband, whom she loves very much, touch her.

And don’t even get me started on spiders or snakes?

How about you? Do you have any unusual fears?
Have you ever let your fear stop you from doing something you wanted to do?

What is it about fear, that so many of us enable it to run our lives?
And more importantly, how do we stop it, and take back our control?

First off, let’s make sure we’re on the same page as to what fear is.

Fear is an emotion. A feeling. It is caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm. It is a vital response to physical and emotional danger, if we didn’t feel it, we couldn’t protect ourselves from legitimate threats.

But what is a legitimate threat? And who gets to decide that?

Oftentimes, our fears develop over time from our childhood and/or from traumatic experiences. And without even realizing it, we start holding back, playing it safe. We build a wall around ourselves so as to avoid failure, embarrassment, ridicule, pain, death and even success.

I believe it’s at that point we stop living.
I further believe it’s our responsibility to recognize, confront, and ultimately conquer our fears.

So how do we stop allowing our fears from extorting the joy, happiness, and excitement from our lives? How do we stop existing, and start living?

At the risk of being called simplistic, I have a very easy 2 step answer.

Step one is we challenge ourselves to overcome our fears.

“Accept the challenges so that you can feel the exhilaration of victory”.
General George S. Patton

If you want to change your life, change your energy. And there is no better energy, or vibration, to be sending out into the universe, than that of being victorious.

Step two is to practice.
And the way I practice is by repetition.

I create my own wingman practices to change my belief about any obstacle that is preventing me from achieving that which I want to achieve.

And once I believe I can, I can.

“A belief is only a thought I keep thinking”. Abraham-Hicks

I practice the thought I want to turn into a belief.
And I practice it over and over and over again.
Every day for at least one minute.
Until I believe it.

And today, I’m practicing living fearlessly.

You can join me in my practice by clicking here…


Have a Fearless Day,


PS… You can practice with me every morning, either on Facebook, at Be Your Own Wingman, on Twitter, @wingmanmichael, or on YouTube, at beyourownwingman.