Be Your Own Wingman

Listen in tonight as Rita and I chat with Ryan ‘Gooch’ Nelson on Talk-n-Angels radio show at 7 pm. Click here to listen…
http://www.talknangels.com (halfway down the page click listen live).

After losing all use of his legs and most use of his arms, Gooch taught himself to play the slide guitar.
After much practice, his unique slide technique has caught the ear of many in the music business, as he and his band have opened for the Zac Brown Band, Lynard Skynard, the Allman Brothers band and Tedeschi Trucks band.

Gooch, Rita and I will discuss overcoming challenges, staying positive and achieving your goals and desires.

Also, don’t forget this Saturday, Wingman Workout at NJ Balance Wellness Center, Medford, NJ at 1pm.
It’s time to get things going in a more positive direction.

Keeping Calm and Wingman on,

Michael

Have you ever said or done something you felt bad about?
And not have an opportunity to immediately apologize
and ‘make things right’.
This is the messy place I found myself in recently.

Quick backstory… I went to a Law of Attraction Meet-Up in New York City the other night. I had been to it a few years before, when ‘Be Your Own Wingman’ was still just a hobby. It was mobbed back then, about 70-80 people. It felt too touchy-feely for me then, but now, as I’ve been building the Wingman Workout, I decided it would be wise to go back. After all, Paul, who runs it, must be doing something right to have such a good following.

Second time back there, about 50 people.
All practicing being positive. It was beautiful.

The only problem was me.
I timed my day terribly and got stuck in New York City traffic.
My hour and a half ride had taken close to 4 hours.
I came in with attitude.

So much was my concern about traffic that I left a bit early.
My poor planning had put a damper on the whole experience.

Over the next few days I realized how much I gained from Paul’s workshop. I had a good positive feeling from it and I also got a few ideas and practices I could utilize in my Wingman Workout.

What could be bad? Sounds like a win-win all around.

Except, as co-host of the Talk-n-Angels radio show,
I mentioned, “I didn’t like it”, on air.
And while we’re not Oprah, we do have a following.
And my comments were just plain wrong.
And I heard it about it from some listeners, including Paul.

Here’s a man who is helping people, successfully doing workshops,
and I was being negative.

And what I realized after the fact is… it wasn’t ‘it’ I didn’t like.
It was me.

I was jealous, felt bad about feeling jealous, and felt worse that I had said something unkind about a nice man doing wonderful work.
On the radio.

Talk about buzz kill.

What would you do?

Of course I emailed my apologies and mentioned my mea culpa on the show the following week.

But I still found myself going back to it, like a scab you can’t stop picking. Focusing on something that feels bad, over and over and over again. Not wise for my well being.

So I did what I so often do? I asked, “What would my Wingman say?”

“Change your focus. Move on. Put it behind you.”

Hmmm. Easier said then done.

Though, with that as my goal, I decided to practice changing my focus and moving on. I immediately began feeling better which I feel is always a better time to strategize and come up with a plan.

So here’s my plan. Maybe you can benefit from it as well.

In honor of Paul, I’m going to practice letting the jealousy thing go.
And I’m going to continue practicing until I’m successful.
Every time I feel covetous of another’s joy or success I will immediately practice replacing that feeling with one of celebration for them.

This is called ‘Celebrating the Closeness of the Match’.
By celebrating another’s victory, I stop resisting my own.
This feeling of joy for another’s triumphs is something I can practice.

Practice with me. Say…
“As of right now, I release all feelings of jealousy, covetousness and envy and replace them with love, openness and acceptance.”

Take a minute to feel that, breathe it in. How does it feel to let it go?
Just let it go. It’s not a useful feeling. It’s not helping you in any way.

They say when you can feel joy for others, you’ll start receiving joy for yourself. Give it a try.

It will take some practice. The grooves in my brain want to bring it back where it’s always gone. It will take practice to change that initial response in my mind from jealousy to joyous, from coveting to connecting. Others have done it. I can too.

Today I will start.

In Appreciation,
Michael

Great news.  Today, I am a finisher.

A year ago October, I set a challenge for myself, and I succeeded.
I am now a Certified Law of Attraction Life Coach.

What does it mean to me to be a finisher?
It means I now see life with ‘different eyes’.
I now see life as one who finishes.

Unfortunately, there haven’t been many moments in my life I would call myself a finisher.
Fortunately, one of them is right now.

It feels good.  The feeling of satisfaction of a job well-done,
or as General Patton said, “Accept challenges so you may feel the exhilaration of success”.

Well, I did, and I do, and if there is one thing this course taught me (there are many) it’s we should celebrate these moments.
For when we rejoice in our triumphs we get more to rejoice about.

I can’t tell you exactly why or how it happens. However, I believe it has a lot to do with physics and Sir Isaac Newton’s first law of motion; ‘an object in motion stays in motion, an object at rest stays at rest, unless acted upon by an unbalance force’.

So the fact is, if we’re in the motion of feeling better, by definition of Newton’s first law, it makes sense
that we would continue feeling better, right?

Oops!  Unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.

What might that force be?
In my life, that ‘force’ always came from the darkness of my own mind.
Negative thoughts that sabotaged me from finishing things I wanted to complete, from having that wonderful feeling of success.

How do we stop that ‘unbalanced force’?
One way is to forgive ourselves for not learning it earlier.
I now see so clearly how those ‘learning situations’ helped propel me to where I am right now.
And right now, I am a finisher.

And you know what.  You can be too.
Here’s a fun little practice to get you started.

Have you had a great moment lately?  How about a good one?
Can you think of anything good that has happened recently in your life?
Now just hold onto it for an extra moment or two.

Was it a feeling of success, a loving feeling, an ‘I feel great feeling?
Whatever that feeling was, and no matter how short it felt, can you practice holding onto it?

I try to ‘feel’ it for exactly one minute, and I’ve found when I’m able to do that, I’m able to get science working for me instead of against me.  And as always, the feeling I send out into the universe comes back to me in ‘spades’.

Not withstanding my client who said, “one minute is a long time”, it’s not.
(btw… we began doing Wingman Workouts with him and his staff, and his business increased 80% last year).

Call it Karma, call it the Power of Positive Thinking, call it the Law of Attraction, or call it Sir Isaac Newton’s first Law of Motion.
Whatever you call it, you will not find anything that contradicts it, actually the more research you do,
the more proof you will find that it’s true.

So why not practice it?
Now is a great time to think about what you want to accomplish this year.
Here’s a good start …

This year I want to ____________________________ (fill in the blank).

I’d be honored to help?
Let’s see if we can make your 2014 one fantastic year.

Thanks for allowing me to be your wingman today.
In Appreciation,

Michael